Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Minyak wangi

Kejadian ini terjadi pada suatu terminal bas ketika menjelang perayaan. Ketika itu terminal penuh sesak, sehingga untuk berjalan pun susah. Seorang perempuan, dengan susah payah akhirnya dapat duduk di satu seat yang masih lagi kosong.

Kerana lama sangat menunggu tetiba perempuan tadi terasa ingin membuang air kecil .... kacau2 fikir perempuan ini. Kalau turun, hendak ke tandas, tempat duduk ini tentu akan menjadi milik orang lain. lantaran itu, perempuan itu membuang air kecil disitu ( Seat sebelah nyer )

Tak lama kemudian datang seorang lelaki yang hendak duduk di sebelah perempuan tersebut. Melihat tempat duduknya basah, maka lelaki itu pun bertanya :

Lelaki : Maaf yer . . , mengapa tempat duduk ini basah ?

Perempuan : Oh . . maaf, ini . . anu . . , minyak wangi saya tadi tumpah . . , tak ada tutupnya . . . . Kemudian lelaki tadi mengeluarkan sapu tangannya dan mulai membersihkan tempat duduk itu. Akan tetapi dia mula curiga dengan baunya yang lain, maka diciumnya sapu tangan itu . . . .

Akhirnya sambil tersenyum lelaki itu berkata : Wah . . . . . , kalau minyak wangi yang seperti ini . . ,

penutupnya ada pada saya. . .

Bagaimana Cara Makan, Begitulah Cintanya



" Ish! Pelahapnya dia makan! 'Cancel' nak buat pak we!! Tengoklah tu
makanan tepi bibir pun tak dilapnya. Eiii....teruknya."

Perhatikan gaya teman kamu makan! Masing-masing ada gaya yang
tersendiri. Ada yang makan penuh kesopanan, ada yang makan sambil bercakap
bahkan sambil tersembur pun ada! Ha...jangan tak tahu. Gaya makan si dia di
meja makan juga ada memberikan gambaran sikap sebenar si dia. Apa kata
kita selidik. Perhatikan lah bagaimana gaya si dia makan tapi jangan
pula sampai dia terperasan. Barulah kamu boleh menilai peribadinya.

Makan dengan tenang :
-Wah! Skima habis nampaknya. Suapannya penuh hati-hati. Tapi sikapnya
itu buat kamu bosan. Geram pun ada gak. Mana taknya, dia seolah-olah
lebih 'minat' dengan makanan itu berbanding dengan diri kamu sendiri.
Namun
disebalik sikap dingin si dia itu menggambarkan bahawa dia seorang yang
tegas dalam! membuat keputusan dan usah diragui soal kesetiaannya. Kamu
tetap satu di hatinya! Cewah!

Asyik belek makanan :
-Hai! Dia lebih banyak pandang makanan daripada wajah kamu! Macamlah
makan tu sedap sangat. Perhatikan cara dia makan. Cukup teliti. Misalnya
kalau makan ikan, tulang-tulang ikan itu siap disusun di tepi pinggan.
Elok saja! Usah gusar, itu menandakan dia amat prihatin dalam tiap apa
juga yang dilakukan. Selain itu, tentu saja dia memang serius dengan
kamu. So, usahlah diragukan cintanya!

Serius ketika makan :
-Kiranya gaya makan dia okey saja. Tak terlalu cepat atau lambat
sangat. Sesekali dia akan berbual tapi taklah kerap sangat. Bermakna kamu
masih lagi 'wujud' di depannya. Namun ketika mengunyah, matanya asyik
perhatikan kamu hingga kadangkala kamu nak makan pun segan. Alahai!
Bertuahnya badan! Nampak sangat dia teramat sayang terhadap kamu dan tak mahu
kamu 'hilang' sesaat pun dari pandangannya. Jaga-jaga, kang nanti
tercekik tulang pulak! Sikap pelindung jelas ditunjukkan terhadap diri kamu.
Berbahagialah
yek!

Makan sambil borak :
-Syok sangat berbual dengan kamu sampaikan nasi di dalam pinggan pun
tak luak. Itu menggambarkan si dia seorang yang periang dan susah nak
tengok dia marah. Tapi, merajuk tu adalah. Selain itu, dia juga gemar
berterus-terang kerana baginya itu adalah antara perkara utama untuk
memastikan sesebuah perhubungan itu berjaya. Tapi awas, jangan buat dia
marah. 'Angin satu badan'lah pulak!

Makan sambil kerap tengok jam :
-Tiap kali makan, selalu nak cepat sedangkan masa masih pangjang dan
tak ada perkara yang nak 'dikejar'. Jangan salah faham, bukan dia ada
date dengan gadis/jejaka lain, cuma itu dah memang tabiat dia. Itu semua
menunjukkan bahawa dia sebenarnya amat menitikberatkan soal masa. Tengok
saja tiap kali berjanji. Mesti 'on time' dia sampai. Sebab tu dia tak
suka seseorang yang lembap.

Makan sambil merungut :
-Ada saja yang tak kena. Makanan tak sedaplah,macam kat
cafe.....,kurang garamlah dan macam-macam lagi. Kadangkala tu, sakit
juga hati kamu dibuatnya. Alah! Biasalah tu, dia kan jenis yang suka
berterus-terang. Apa saja yang dirasakan tak puas hati akan diluahkan
walaupun kadangkala ia merimaskan kamu.Tapi di sebalik sikapnya itu, ia
menunjukkan bahawa dia teramat mengambil berat terhadap diri kamu. Cuma
awas, dia tu kuat cemburu. Jadi, jangan gatal-gatal nak menjeling
jejaka/gadis kat cafe atau di meja sebelah walaupun sekadar untuk cuci mata.
Nahas u all nanti!

~bagaimana pula cara korang makan ?

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Evaluation time....


This is the time of the year where you are evaluated on your performance throughout the year.

To those that have a KPI (Key Performance Indicator), it will be easier to gauge whether you have achieve or missed your target. Yang tak ade....try and pick the best out of many la kan....

Rata2nya kita akan over-zealous dlm mengisi borang nie....practically none will mark themselves below average or not able to achieve target...using Likert scale of 1-5, most will fill-in as 3 or 4. And perhaps those who felt that they are world class performer....may fill in as 5.

Which brings me to one of my office colleague, it is no secret to the whole office that he used to be the favourite son of one of the top director here....with that he enjoys meteoric rise in promotion and salary. Apa saje masalah dia....dia akan dapat backing top director tersebut ler...kira ada cable baik punya la kan...( I was not with the company yet....all this were told by more than 5 people from diff.departments...so the possibility of it being true...is high). Now, we have a new top director....who doesnt "makan pujuk" atau "kaki report"...so he suffers la kan...but yet he marks himself as world class performer in 6 out of his 10 aptitude questionaires....i mean, what self belief?!! If he were a lollypop, he will be sucking himself!

But suka hati dia laa....dia pun tak kacau aku, cuma ramai duk cerita itu ini ...aku pun terpaksa cerita kat korang lak....nanti aku simpan lama2 dlm hati, aku gila lak....you wouldnt want a crazy blogger do you? Muahahahhaha....

Anyway, my principle is simple...work hard...play hard and party like hell. You dont need to brag abt it, or tell your boss everything that need to be done...becoz if you really slog out in the office, people will notice anyway...they know you can solve their problem, they know they can relate to you becoz you are a fellow man, so why the need to suck up to your bosses and tell inflated things?

My guess is simple...perhaps this people have low self confidence...they may actually have low skills but desired more, unfortunately dont wanna work hard for it...they wanted it easy, they wanted to be accepted by the top boss, so they becomes barua...this psychological backburner doesn't come during their working days, they have harboured this sucking up attitude since they were little...probably due to sibling rivalry, or small genitalia, or i dont know....may be constant failures in their life, didnt get to get into borading school perhaps....not in the first 11 in the football team, not being elected as a prefect, being jilted in their first approach to their long admired girlfriends or boyfriends, the list is endless...

So they resort to other methods....which is unfortunate, because they may be a really nice person...but something wicked this way come should they are pushed or threathen...

All i can say is that...believe in yourself...and trust god on this, you will reap the reward of your own honesty and kindness...if not today, perhaps tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow...if not wait laa....sabar pun separuh dari iman...heh..heh.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Malays and it beliefs....

My partner's grandmother passed yesterday.

God bless her soul and may Allah place her in the those who are constantly blessed.

However, much need to be said on things that has happen prior to her death.

A week ago, before the CNY holidays...my family were rushed to our kampung on the news of her impending death. We started our journey abt 4.30 am...and arrive at 12.15pm. Straight to her house and tend to her illness. She looks more like an Ethopian during the famine days more than an old woman in her last days. Grasping for air...she is weaken by the minute.

Having my fair share of seeing my relatives passed away, i knew her time will come...it is just a matter of when. Late last nite, prior to our arrival....a group of vilagers even recite the yassin feeling that she could die any minute. But somehow she prevailed....and that was the beginning of my disposition.

Due to her strong zest of life, much have been said abt her, that perhaps she has something "unholy" residing inside her, that she kept something like a "hantu raya" that helps to preserve her life. She was a Mak Andam before which heighten the speculations that she kept some sort of "help" during her practice to be successful...To add more drama to it, one of our relative who learn the art of "andam" also strucked by a sort of hysteria and shrieked in fear when closed to her.

So then....so many bomohs and shamans come out in the woods ...doing their chanting and trance, medium and all sorts of methods to rid of her evil spirits. Her sons even told me that their mother kept something with her and angered by the fact that she didnt tell them abt it.

Okay ....let's stop and ponder abt it awhile.

1) If you are their mother and assuming that you do have a "hantu raya" accompanied you, would you called your children one day on a quite little evening and tell them that you have one?? I mean ....who's the hell going to do that? Jatuhlah maruah dia ...bodoh la bodoh.

2) Even if she kept a "hantu raya" even...it is still not nice to say it in front of her ...she is placed in the guest room and can hear what you are saying. It is disrespect and totally insensitive to call her "memakai" and what not. Afterall, she is still your mother....and syurga di bawah kaki ibu la beb!

It is not i do not believe in some ghosts and evil spirits, i know they exist..but to the best of my knowledge , jin and all these spirits cannot harmed us directly. Cerita org mati akibat terpijak anak jin ....adalah bodoh sama sekali kerana mana kita nampak jin tersebut, kalau kita nampak takkan kita nak pijak la kan....anak jin tuh??Anak jiran sebelah yang kekadang memekak pun kita takkan pijak sampai mati....apalah bodoh sangat!!!

Yet...references are made to Misteri Nusantara and all those mustika articles. Alahai...i may be a bad muslim but i know in times like this, our holy scriptures and hadith should be the source rather than those nonsense.

Itu yang aku kecewa sangat...mentality org Melayu kita in the 21st century...lagi negara maju, makin banyak bomoh and all those nonsense, somehow we need to have one foot in the different realm.

Correct me if i am wrong....but kepercayaaan karut nie haruslah ditinggalkan...silap2 syirik beb!

Monday, February 14, 2005

Monday Blues...

Ah ...

That was my initial response when the alarm starts ringing....

A reminder that i has to get back to my usual routine....

But to be honest.....so many things has happen last week.

It will take many entries....just for a start.

Bukan tak boleh buat kat rumah tapi kalau kat rumah, pakat tgk TV and main game aje laa...

Meanwhile, looking at my desk...there seem to be a tonne of work that need to be done...

Might as well...i finished those off, then blog to my heart content...

Till then...

Friday, February 04, 2005

AKU DAN EMOSI

SP

Mengapa engkau begitu menyemburui kehidupanku

Ape salah ku sampai aku tidak berpeluang

Untuk melakukannya tanpamu..

Kerna mungkin kau tahu aku tidak mampu

Untuk hidup tanpamu..



SP..

Boleh dikatakan hampir setiap hari

Aku harus bertemu denganmu

Mengapa sehingga begini sekali cemburumu

Menghantui siang dan malamku..

Lantas aku jadi takut untuk berhadapan denganmu..



SP

Bila keluar..kaulah yang selalu membawa bencana..

Bila ramai orang memandangku..kau seakan tertawa..

Membuatku lebih waspada dan kadangkala kecewa..

Aduh kenapa engkau juga yang muncul..

Kenapa kau sentiasa mengongkong hidupku



SP..

Kadang kala bila ku ingin lari darimu..

Aku terpaksa mencari port2 yang tersembunyi..

Tersembunyi dari pandangan mata lain..

Letih kakiku berjalan semata untuk mengelakmu..

Berpeluh-peluh badanku semata2 tidak mahu berjumpamu



SP

Mengapa tidak kau ganggu saja orang lain

Tinggalkan saja diriku

Kerana aku sudah tidak sanggup diganggu olehmu

Olehmu yang tidak mempunyai perasaan

Oleh engkau yang tidak punyai hati perut



Aaaarrrrgggghhhhhh berambus la ko SP

Hmmmmm.hampehhhh..hampeh ko.

Hampeh larrr ko,side parking

Thursday, February 03, 2005

The week after...


Many things has happen since i last dipped into my blog.

Syed Tamim shot himself.

One bloke got beaten to death becoz of some idiot who thinks he is the king of the road.

Anelka moves to Fenerbahce. Liverpool has beaten Charlton 1-0. Arsenal lose again to Man Utd.

And i was diagnosed by the eye specliasit that i suffered from glucoma.

That is the best week i had so far this year....all the joy in the world and a little footnote of sadness.

I wasnt deterred....the fact that i could lose one of my eyesight forever seems like a nightmare that wouldnt come true.

I believe that i will beat this thing....i will get better.

But if i didnt .....nobody would say that i didnt try to live my life to the fullest.

Am i angry with god for this disease?

Why should i?

I can only kneel down and marvel at this guidance that only strengthen my self belief.

Perhaps this is just a facade that will pass through....but i know i just telling that to myself to make myself fell good.

But i do feel good....if i am destined to have one eye...so be it. Perhaps this is for the better...perhaps i ended up working for Hospital Tun Hussein Onn.

Or may be joined some triad.

When bad things happen to some of your friends, either being robbed, get mugged, maliciously treated by others, raped or cheated, deep inside you tell yourself....

" That wouldnt happen to me....because i will take care of myself"

But things happen either you plan to avoid it or not....it is up to you either to learn from it or die from it.

One of my office colleague has just heard that he is to be transferred to a different department ....he was afraid and this has eaten away his health. Slowly his fear crumpled him...making him a lesser man. He can no longer come to work because he is too frail....he will broke down during work. And what makes things worse what that he used to be the head boy of some top boarding school in Malaysia.

To be honest with you...initially i sympathise with him becoz he is somewhat victimise..but know i honestly felt that he is a wek human being. Come on for crying out loud! You are just going to be transferred to another department...you are not getting fired or anything. Changes will benefitted you somehow...learn new skills, work with new people etc.

Yet he took in negatively...he thought it was the end of the world....letihnya la lu. Pardon me from being such a killjoy but he should be stronger..and proves the doubters wrong. Yet he choose to retreat into his shell and demand attention. Silly fool...you will only lose your self respect with this.

May be i have a different way of thinking but i am what i am....and i believe that no matter what happens, we should face it with grace.

It is not like you are going to lose an eye like me.....i am still smilling and i am still working.

May be i am the idiot...

Heh..heh..hheee....



Thursday, January 27, 2005

Happiness.....is it out there?


On my way to work....

Glimpse of faces i saw along the way....

Be it man, woman or child....

I began to wonder what lingers in their heart.

A man driving a BMW alone.....listening to his radio....is he happy?

I wonder further...his eyes throws a long gaze....probably thinking about work.

I looked on my left....a man driving his Wira aeroback with his wife, both look at a different way...probably something happen on the way to work that froze their conversation...

I look ahead...a couple on a motorcycle, the wife hugging the husband tightly, happily chatting...perhaps reminiscing what happen late last nite. Giggling and pat her husband repeatly...may be..may be.

Drove further....another stop... due to the presence of a traffic policeman.

The young policeman...ushering a zillion cars to different path. He commandeer his job with pride....no smiles though, may be he is at peace.

Again...i look right. A young executive perhaps....driving his blue Satria, singing some tune along with the radio while puffing a cigarette. Perhaps he is happy because he felt he is made...finally, i am here..may be that is what he is thinking.

I look left another man in his late 30s...driving an old Iswara, also puffing a cigarette. Again the long gaze with a large scale frown. He look tired and worn-out...probably been staying up all nite due to some problem. Perhaps some loan he need to settle.....or his wife wants a new car but he couldnt afford it....or trouble at work...who knows, but i felt his pain...and his un-happiness.

Looking ahead...a young woman in her kurungs, sitting on her scooter waiting for the traffic policeman to waive "Go". In her UKM jacket probably from her university days, she waited patiently....totally focus on the policeman. Probably eager to reach her workplace to clear off her desk from being totally cluttered...or a male friend waiting patiently at some cafetaria near her workplace.

Are they all happy ...the middle-age man in his BMW? The couple in the wira aeroback? The young executive? The young lady on her VS150?

May be they are all happy....i just didnt know it...may be they were happy 30 minutes ago...or they gonna be happy 10 minutes later. Lucky i can't read mind....or i might drown myself in their thoughts.

As i reach the lifts to my office....i look at the myriad of faces waiting to go up to their respective floors...are they happy?

Then..i asked the last question that beg to ask...." Am i happy?"

Multiples stop before i reach my destination while in the lift....slowly i raise my gaze and muttered slowly...

" Happy is such a strong word...a tad too extreme actually....."

" I am more of a "content" person than a "happy-happy" person"

" I dont complaint that much and i dont work that hard for some goals i set in life....it is more of a play that i acted on smaller scale in each minute...."

Hmmm......play safe huh??

Ha..ha..ha...



Wednesday, January 26, 2005

A victim...

I am a victim....

A victim of time...

A victim of consequences...

A victim of causality....

A victim of popular belief...

A victim of fashion.....

A victim of fad....

A victim of my own dreams...

A victim of my own beliefs....

A victim of perceptions....

What else have i not fall victim into?

There must something that may end this....

There must be something that can stop this....

There must be something that can remove me from being stigmatised....

There must be....

There must be....


Tuesday, January 25, 2005

How to tell....??

HOW TO TELL IF A GUY LIKES A GURLZ

1. The guy will try to make you laugh.
2. He'll flirt with you when he can.
3. He might try to show off around you.
4. He'll help you out, if you ask for it.
5. He'll stick up for you when you need it most.
6. He'll be friendly to you and all your friends.
7. He might call you for no good reason.
8. He might make fun of you, in a joking way.
9. He'll tell you that you did good, even if you did
horrible.
10. He'll make eye contact with a happy grin on his
face


HOW TO TELL IF A GIRL LIKES A GUY:

1. The girl will laugh at all your jokes.
2. She'll stare at you with a smile on her face.
3. She'll ask you who you like, continuously.
4. She might try to make you jealous.
5. She'll beg that you do everything for her.
6. She might start talking to your friends.
7. She'll talk to you about the different varieties of
guys.
8. She'll always seem to be talking about how nice
you are.
9. She'll always be flirting with every other guy
except you.
10. She'll always ask what to do in a bad situation.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

Tips untuk disayangi suami...

hari nih cam biol sket! tapi sumernyer masih terkawal. tapi ade tips untok
pompuaan² yg teringin nak masok syurga dan disayangi laki memasing hiks!



1) siapkan segala persediaan suami pepagi nak gi kije. selain brekfes,
siapkan baju, suar, spender, neck tie, stoken.


2) lepas laki mandi teros sambot laki depan pintu bilik air, lapkan badan
dia sampai kering, pakaikan spender, baju, suar sumer sikatkan rambot.

3) sidaikan towel!

4) suapkan brekfes!

5) pakaikan stoken kalo nak masok syurge, pakaikan kasot!

6) panaskan enjin kereta, bukakan pintu kereta, bukakan pintu pagar dan tutup balik pintu pagar lepas laki kuar. jangan bagi jantan lain masok umah ptoih!

7) bile laki balik, mandikan dia dan pakaikan baju, suar cam biase siapkan makan malam dan suapkan dia makan.

8) jangan loper sidaikan towel lepas mandikan laki korang!

9) sesekali belanja laki dinner kat hotel memahal ape salahnyer!

10) bayarkan doit kereta laki, bill tipon dan bayar sekali duit rumah, api,
air, astro dan barang dapor serta service kereta.

11) nak tido tuh, sila berbugil lam keadaan seksi dan wangi. dok lam selimut dendiam tunggu laki dan berikan layanan terbaik sampai laki tido! korang tak puas, korang nyer pasal!kehkehkeh!

12) bertolak ansor, tahun pertama balik raya umah laki, tahun kedua umah laki, tahun ketiga pon umah laki dan begitu jugak tahon² yang seterosnyerrr....

13) kalo membeli belah jangan bior laki bayor. kalo bulih korang bayor sendirik,nak lagik bagos, bayor sekalik laki punyer bebarang yg dia beli hiks!

kalo korang berjaye boat sumer nih, korang la isteri mithali yg akan ke syurga nanti. korang juga
akan disayangi suami hingga ke akhir hayat dan menjadi contoh kepada anak² serta idola kepada isteri orang lain hiks!

Apa yang lelaki fikir tentang apa yang pompuan kata...

ni tips sesaje... bokan sumer camnih... jangan ade
laks yg terase pastu buat huru hara hiks!

kalo laki kate : "alah, tak kan saye datang lambat sikit pon, awak nak naik hangin! bukannye saye tak datang terus!"

dalam hati dia : alamak! sian awek aku tunggu lama,
panas terik pulak tu, lenkali aku takmo lambat lagik arh!

kalo pompuan kate : "sori ekk sayang, saye lambat sikit. lenkali saye tak lambat lagik, saye janji!"

dalam hati dia : alah! tunggu bokan pakai doit pon.
lambat sikit (2 jam) pon nak masam moker!

kalo laki kate : "lenkali nak gi memane gitau! jangan sesuke hati nak merayap merate hala!"

dalam hati dia : saye riso kalo jadik ape² kat awak. awak tak
gitau mane awak pegi, kalo hilang mane saye nak carik awak?

kalo pompuan kate : "saye bokan nak kontrol awak tapi kalo awak
gitau mane awak pegi, takde la saye riso sangat!"

dalam hati dia : jangan harap la awak gi memane tanpa saye. awak ingat saye caye kat awak ke? ntah ape awak buat blakang saye gaknyer!

kalo laki kate : "awak bagi saye kad je? lenkali bagi la kereta ke rumah ke tiket penerbangan ke london ke hiks!"

dalam hati dia : saye tak penah rase spesel camnih. kad awak
bagi ni mesti saye bace berulang kali.

kalo pompuan kate : "mekasih sayang! mane awak tau saye suke bunge? awak ni romantik la"

dalam hati dia : aiseh! bunge jek ke? ingatkan dapat la
rantai emas ke... paling cikai pon dapat la cincin ke... huh!

kesimpulannyer...

laki : bile hati dah bersuara molot takyah nak berkata

pompuan : bile molot bersuara, lam hati lain kisahnyer!


Selamat Raya Aidiladha...

Monday, January 17, 2005

Heheh. Sila vote untuk kenyataan artis malaysia yang paling bodoh.


Calon pertama: CHEF WAN

"Tolonglah! ia sebuah kelab tarian dan sudah tentu niat saya pergi
ke sana untuk menari. Bagi saya itu tidak salah

kerana niat saya untuk berhibur sambil bersenam. Bukankah
menari satu daripada riadah seperti aerobik?",


Calon kedua: MISHA OMAR

"Misha rasa gembira menyambut kemerdekaan negara kali ini
kerana kali ini, dapat berduet ngan abang jamal".



Calon ketiga: SYANIE

"Syanie...apakah niat anda apabila anda berjaya mengurangkan berat badan"...

Jawapan dari Syanie.."Niat saya yg pertama..ingin memakai bikini di tepi pantai.....".



Calon keempat: AHLI KUMPULAN X FACTOR (tak tau sapa)

"Saya gembira menyambut hari kemerdekaan kita bila negara kita berjaya
mencapai kemerdekaan pada tanggal 31

Ogos, 1956," jawab salah seorang ahli kump X-Factor apabila ditemubual dalam
satu rancangan khas mengenai kemerdekaan tahun lalu dalam siri
"Bersama Norman" yang disiarkan di TV1.



Calon kelima: FIZA

"Fiza pakai seksi sebab bersyukur dengan pemberian tuhan

True story on how Sri Langka handles the Tsunami?!!

On 26th Dec '04 early morning several hrs before the catastrophe happened, Honolulu Tsunami Monitoring centre have been trying to call[Wicky] our Meteorological Dept. monitoring centre in Pallekelle and Colombo but failed as the department was closed for Christmas.

They also got in touch with the Presidents' office. However, it was informed that she's out of the island on a private vacation.

Finally they called Prime minister's secretariat, but Prime Minister was out on his morning walk.

Thinking at least it's best to keep him vigilant on this, the Honolulu officials left the message with the person who picked up the phone to inform the Prime Minister that there's a Tsunami coming from Indonesia.

On Prime Minister's return, the operator told the Prime Minister about the call, said Tsunami from Indonesia is arriving in 2 hrs. Prime Minister promptly took action to send a delegation to the Katunayake Airport with name boards "Welcome Mr. T. Sunami - Indonesia".

Saturday, January 15, 2005

Blackout and kesakitan yang datang...

It was like any other day...except by 12.16pm, the lights suddenly flickers, i thought..somebody must have use a weater heater like my boarding school days. But i press on keep on typing and suddenly the air-cond stops...and then the lights went out...PC went off as well.

"Shit!"...

That was what i said...not becoz i had a blacout but becoz i didnt save the bloody file. How i wished i had a UPS then. Haiya.....lepak and frollicking around until my stomach get a better of me....i am hungry and pure boredom beginning to take its toll. I hesitated but decided what the hell la kan...

There i go, descending the steps from the 31st Floor.....

My god, until now ...the betis is killing me!!

Tapi itu aje la nak update...penat dah nie....

Sekian, saya yang sakit kaki turun tangga kerana TNB lupa bayo bill...muahahahhahahahh!!1

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Arabs and its world..

Interesting...

A letter i get from my mailing list.

Asian victims children of a lesser God?
K Temoc

Jan 12, 05 1:49pm

I refer to the letter Iraq war factor in tsunami aid. I am not entirely surprised by the writer’s defensive spin for the rich Gulf Arab states’ stingy contributions to the tsunami survivors.

I have come across worse cases of such spin, with some even blaming the Americans for 'controlling' these Arab states' purse strings. The only common thread for these excuses appears to be a lack of evidence in their wishful excuses. But I see their frantic need to defend the indefensible,especially in the face of massive and generous aid from the non-Muslim world.

Ironically, the majority of those who perished or who are now suffering due to the tsunami just happen coincidentally to be Muslims. While Malaysia's misfortune has been comparatively light, Indonesia's experience has been unspeakably terrible.

The official death toll is at a frightening 100,000 while the total expected death toll could well be more horrendous. Millions remain homeless, having lost everything they owned. Their rehabilitation may take decades, requiring further billions of dollars.

The world in general, both governments and the general public, has rallied wonderfully to help the victims. Australia, China, Canada, Europe, Japan, Russia, US, even afflicted India and Malaysia and a host of other countries have contributed magnificently, while the UN has played a leading role. Even the IMF has played its part with a massive US$250 million donation.

But as everyone knows, the most disappointing group has been the very rich Gulf Arab states - Saudi Arabia, Kuwait and a few others. Despite being badgered by the Kuwaiti and Lebanese press, their donations continued to be shamefully pitiful.

Oil-rich Kuwait, who owes the free world an enormous debt for liberating its people from an invading force some years back, the official response has been disgraceful, ungrateful and uncaring in general. It gave a pathetic US$2 million, and only raised this to an equally shameful US$10 million after its own press had castigated its stinginess.

Meanwhile, Croesus-rich Saudi Arabia, which had promised just US$10 million has reluctantly raised it to US$30 million, again, only after the Gulf press lambasted it for acting the scrooge. But really, only US$30 million for a country blessed with the Midas touch of having a virtually endless supply of black gold.

But the issue goes beyond these rich Arab states' parsimonious attitude. There is in them an inherent racist attitude clouded with religious rationalisation towards their Asian Muslim brethren.

Tarek Fatah, a Muslim leader and television host based in Toronto stated angrily in the Daily Times of Pakistan: ‘The disappointment is not just because of the pathetic contributions by Saudi Arabia or Kuwait. It is compounded by the message being repeated ad nauseam in their mosques and media that the earthquake was a punishment from God for the sins of the people of South and Southeast Asia.

‘The Kuwaitis and Saudi Islamists lecturing the world about morality is an outrage. Or is it that in the eyes of most Kuwaitis and Saudis, the dead belonged to the despised underclass who live as fourth class citizens in the Gulf States. Dark-skinned Indian, Sri Lankan, Indonesian; truck drivers, cooks and maids; all children of a lesser God in the eyes of these Islamists of the Gulf?’

Some food for thought for our Arab-philes.

I just would like to add ...that Michael Schumacher, the all-time great F1 Driver donated US10 million of his money to the victims of Tsunamis. Imagine that...he alone contributed that amount compared to Kuwait, which Malaysian soldeirs help to rebuild. This is the same Arab countries that refused the help their arab brethren in Palestine..eventhough Palestine is even closer to them.

What disgust me the most was the way they throw money away in Malaysia thru unthoughful spending and pure pleasure. Awek Melayu kita pun peluk laa pak Arab nie jugak....tu yang panas tuu!!

Malas nak tulis banyak pasal Arab modern nie....i just felt that they totally forgot where they cam from....a desert dwellers before the advent of our Prophet, Muhamad SAW.


Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road?

KINDERGARTEN TEACHER:
To get to the other side.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

RONALD REAGAN:
I forget.

KARAM SINGH VALIA:
Seperti yang saudara dapat lihat, kelihatan
ayam-ayam itu sedang melintas jalan, mereka bukan
sahaja melintas jalan malah membuang
najis di atas jalan dan ini adalah pencemaran
yang paling hebat di maya pada masa ini.
Bapa-bapa dan ibu-ibu Ayam haruslah mengambil
inisiatif untuk melatih ayam-ayam Agar menahan
najis sewaktu melintas jalan, sekian saya sudahi
dengan.........
Ayam di jalan di lintaskan
Ayam di reban mati tak makan

RICHARD M. NIXON:
The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat,
the chicken did NOT cross the road.

COMPUTER PROGRAMMER:
In order for the chicken to cross the road
safely they not only
need one driver to access the server farm if not
they will hang in
the middle of the road.

JERRY SEINFELD:
Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why
doesn't anyone ever think
to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing
walking around all over the place, anyway?"

BILL GATES:
I have just released the new Chicken Office
2000, which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your
important documents,
and unbalance your checkbook

MAHATHIR:
You know, I am tired of all this..'apa-nama'
chicken-chicken bisnes....the foreign powers
should stop
intervening in our domestic affairs and just
leave our chickens alone..... if they want to...'apa nama' cross the
road, they should be allowed to cross the road .. Malaysia is a
democratic country,we let our chickens do whatever they want
to do.... as long as they don't threaten the Malay unity and try to
topple the government...

ABDULLAH BADAWI:
Ini semua adalah khabar angin sahaja...jangan
percaya khabar - khabar angin ini semua...biasalah ini adalah
taktik pembangkang
untuk memecah belahkan perpaduan ayam - ayam
semua...jangan percaya..jangan percaya....

SAMY VELLU :
ayyooyoo...belakang cerita lain kali, kita sude
bikin banyak jembatan, itu ayam musti guna
jembatan untu lintas itu jalan lagi pun kalu itu ayam mau pigi
jalan-jalan,beritau sama saya juga, saya bolley
buat lebbey banyak toll........

BILL CLINTON :
I've had so many chicks, I can't remember...

Monday, January 10, 2005

What lies inside in a heart of a broken man??

Past weekend was eventful to say the least. It was hectic to the very core.

Saturday wake up early, send the missus to PWFC for Education Fair. Then rushed off to my workplace. By the time i am scheduled to go to my class meeting, a colleague called me up saying that one of our acquintences suffered a mild stroke and currently being admitted at Damansara Hospital. He is only 38 yrs old and never smoke a bud of cigarettes. Control his diet and only drinks plain water. Why he suffers the stroke only god knows la kan...but i suspect that since he is a soft spoken man and never fight his ground, he kept all in anger inside slowly building up stress mentally. Still, luckily he is still young and hopefully mend his ways later on...why keep your emotion bottle up la kan, just say what you wanted to say...and get on with your life. We Malays are too "sopan santun" in terms of saying the brutal truth.

After that i rushed off to my class which has already started ....i rushed to do the transaction and table up the whole journals. By the time we finished the journals, it was time to play futsal. We are already late as it is for i have to ship severals of my classmate to the place as well. Played like a crazy horse for two hours and ruptured some muscle as well due to lack of warming session, but it goes with the territory la kan. Win by massive margin but clumsy in defence at times.

After that had a long conversation with my friends abt relationships and the way forward. I have little knowledge of the trials and tribulation in being a couple in yuor working life. I met my partner since high school and never looked back ever since..so it wasnt run of the mill love story ler. But my friends seem to have difficulties settling down la kan...some has been in a relationship for more than 7 yrs but currently in a turmoil because of presence of a third party. The sense of betrayal that he felt cannot be measured by me or anyone else. Only he knows...

The other is also in a similar state. He met his soulmate in his university days. It is said by those who knew him then that he is hardly seen without his girlfriend around. Everywhere he goes...she will be there. It was believe that they are THE ITEM la kan....she's being one year younger than him...so brotherly and sisterly.

But after he worked for a year and the girl graduated, things turn sour. The girl started demanding things that he can't hardly provide and the girl family especially the older sister started to backstab him as well saying that should she marries the guy, her life will be a misery. She was confuse and unaware that he is also alienating him as well. The mum decided to steps in...being the matchmaker and marries her off with one of her wealthy friends.

My friend was distraught to say the least...in fact he was devastated.

Till now he cannot maintain a long relationship...I can practically sense fear in his tone and unwillingness to talk abt relationship. He is good looking mind you but history seems to be a bridge too far for him. Even if he meet some girls that he fancies, the relationship turns bad after a couple of weeks. Failure to reach her via phone was instantly diagnosed as a signed that she is seeing a another man. So he is at best touch a go.

So what lies in heart of a broken man? May be it is so dark that even a glimpse of light is becoming uncomfortable even for a moment. Or Perhaps it is like a spring of eternal bleeding. Becoz so many writes abt a broken heart of a woman, i need to write abt theb heart of a broken man. What man cannot have their heart broken ker?? Muahahhahahahah......




Friday, January 07, 2005

Bagaimana nak kuruskan bandan dengan segera!!

Kerna nak kurus
**************

Seorang mamat yg mmg gemuk masuk ke sebuah fitness center dgn niat utk menguruskan badan.


Seorang lelaki di kaunter bertanya kepada mamat
tadi, "Kami menawarkan 2 program di sini... RM50 utk versi 'Biasa' dan RM100 utk versi 'Cepat'.

"Saya ingat nak ambil yg biasa punya sebab saya baru je nak try kuruskan badan", kata mamat tadi. "OK. Encik sila masuk ke bilik NO. 5 di
penjuru bilik sana", jawap lelaki penjaga kaunter.

Mamat tadi pun masuk laa ke bilik yg di suruh lalu
menutup pintunya. Selang 2 minit kemudian, datang laa seorang perempuan yg mmg lawa, cantik, body best, mantap dan segalanya. Dia kemudian
menanggalkan kesemua pakaian sehinggakan mamat tadi dah xsenang duduk dan berpeluh2.

Perempuan tadi berkata, "Kalau tuan dapat kejar saya, tuan bole buat aaaaapa saja dgn saya... hik hik hik" dan dia terus berlari di dalam bilik itu. Mamat tadi pun kejar punya kejar, sampai 10 minit, pun xdapat2 jugak. Dia try lagi sampai akhirnya, dia jatuh terjelepuk ke lantai... pengsan. Apabila dia sedar, dia terus ke penimbang dan mendapati beran badannya telah turun 3kg.

"Wow! Mmg berbaloi aku bayar RM50... mmg senang rupanya nak kuruskan badan", katanya sendirian.

Esoknya, dia datang lagi ke situ dan terus ditegur oleh lelaki di kaunter. Setelah diberitahu program2 seperti semalam jugak, dia bersetuju untuk try versi 'Cepat'.

"OK. Encik sila masuk ke bilik NO. 6 di penjuru
bilik sana", jawap lelaki penjaga kaunter. Setelah beberapa minit didalam bilik itu, datanglaa seorang body-builder yang tough dan terus melondehkan pakaiannya. Body-builder itu berkata, "Saya akan kejar kamu dlm bilik ini dan kalau saya dapat.... hehehe"

Esoknya lelaki tersebut hilang 15KG!!

How Men Decide who to marry??

How guys select the girl they want to marry.....



"Everything that happens has a reason behind..." How guys select the
girl they want to marry.....

A man is dating three women and wants to decide which to marry.He
decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and
watches to see what they do with the money.

The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets
her hair done, purchases new make-up and buys several new outfits, and
dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this
to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. he man is
impressed.

The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts.She gets him a new set of
STRONG golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive
clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent
all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is
impressed.

The third invests the money in the stock market.She earns several times
the $5,000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in
a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future
because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed. The man
thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money.

Guess which lady he chose to marry?


(scroll down for the answer)












He married the most beautiful one!!!!!!
Men are Men Always!!!